its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
