is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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