Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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