oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
