She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize