You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
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