i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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