I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize