When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize
