I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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