Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
