Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
