His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
