There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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