My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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