so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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