opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
