btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize