what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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