If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize