Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Let's get the cat blown out
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
