i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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