just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
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