How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
