this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
