we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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