FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
