I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
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