Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
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