I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
