a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
