I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
