what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
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