thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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