so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
