My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
