well you can't waste a boner
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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