When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Randomize
