So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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