god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Randomize