My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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