So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Randomize
