We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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