During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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