He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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