sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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