There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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