You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
