he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
