So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize