I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
