yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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